Attorney General Jeff Sessions to Make Burning the Confederate Flag Illegal

Posted on by Derby Mack

Sessions has promised his Alabama brethren, “The Confederacy shall rise again.”

Jeff Sessions, that proud son of Alabama, did something incredibly patriotic today.

Vowing to protect, “that unique symbol of Southern dignity,” President Trump’s pick for Attorney General announced that the new administration would make it a crime to burn the Confederate flag.

As a United States Senator, Sessions has long fought against flag desecration. He has voted time and again for a Constitutional ban, but has been thwarted at every turn by radical liberal free speech activists from the North.

In a statement, Mr. Sessions said, “The destruction of the Stars and Bars is intended to incite a violent response rather than make a political statement and such conduct is outside the protections afforded by the first amendment to the Constitution. On a personal level, I am deeply outraged when people abuse this precious reminder of our noble Southern heritage.”

Offenders of the new law will face fines and possible relocation to a network of FEMA camps, when their sponsorship and construction is completed by the end of 2017.

The move follows President Donald J. Trump’s heartfelt apology to the Southern states for the War of Northern Aggression. Legal scholars say the president’s statement opens the door to reparations for the descendants of Confederate soldiers and others damaged by illegal Yankee military actions. Economists estimate that payouts could be as high as $25,000 per heir, with monies drawn from property seized from the liberal northern elite, as well as the descendants of laborers who escaped their lifetime employment contracts at the end of the war.


About This Journalist

Founder, Editor-in-Chief and CEO of, Derby Mack is an American Patriot who has dedicated his life to loving his country and preparing his family for the National Apocalypse. He would like to thank the Founding Fathers, President Reagan and Jesus Christ for the opportunity to share Wisdom with every member of the community. God Bless and Stay Vigilant!