Trump Anxiously Awaiting Ratings Bump From His First Terrorist Attack, Sources Say

Posted on by Henricus Institor

With dozens, even hundreds dead, a domestic terror attack could provide crucial media support for Trump’s agenda.

As President Donald J. Trump looks to consolidate his electoral mandate, the thought of an impending tragedy is never far from his imagination. Analysts at the Pentagon predict that the United States will suffer a “notable” terrorist attack within the next 12 to 18 months, which could result in a 20% ratings bump for the administration.

“When our nation is threatened, Americans know the right thing to do is to drop our petty differences and get in line behind the president,” one expert recently stated.

For Mr. Trump, it can’t happen soon enough, according to sources.

“The president has an ambitious domestic agenda and a ratings boost will only help him with members of Congress,” White House Press Secretary Sean Spicer said in an interview with radio host Michael Savage this weekend. “In fact, it could mean the difference between life and death for many of his policy positions.”

Sources inside the White House further encouraged all conservatives to go on record early praising the new administration’s plans before the terrorist attack. “Get on board with us now or we’re going to steamroll the fuck right over you when the shrapnel starts flying,” warned one highly placed insider.

Trump, a keen student of Russian politics, often points to the 1999 apartment bombings, which were a crucial moment in Vladimir Putin’s consolidation of power. The president has privately expressed interest in how President Putin’s support rose dramatically immediately after the attacks. Senior officals at the CIA are now studying Russian television ratings from that period, with an eye towards capitalizing on a similar situation here on the homefront.

“You always need great graphics combined with raw footage, but the narrative structure needs to be in place before the buildings come down,” Trump advisor Steve Bannon has stated. “President Trump knows that even a 10% Nielsen boost translates into another trillion in defense spending and across the board capital gains tax relief. At 30%, we’re flexing our muscle in Cuba, and at 50% we’re taking Canada and opening up FEMA camps for dissidents.”

About This Journalist

Henricus Institor is the “nom de plume” of a former Internet hacktivist and high ranking member of the atheist radical elite. Yet even there, amongst the most dangerous liberals in the world, he could not hide from God’s Calling. He was reborn in the Blood of Christ in 2011 and today “Henricus Institor” serves as HardDawn.com’s foremost expert on secret left wing agendas and global power conspiracies.

  • Stanley

    I can’t wait to see the look on Trump’s face when he gets his cheery popped!

    • Kaylee-Aurora

      I know what exciting times we live in!