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Because Morning in America Wont Be Easy

Beware the Hidden Psychological Dangers of Restaurant Salads

Thu, Jun 22, 2017 | By Doc Bacon

Is there anything more outlandish than the restaurant salad? These glitzy monstrosities mock you into spending everything in your wallet. And when they arrive at the table, you’re forced to stuff your face like some farm animal, mashing your molars in an exhausting spectacle that snubs out what little dignity you have left in your final dimming years. No, this “green”...

Open Concept Kitchens Are the Height of New World Order Fascism

Thu, Jun 22, 2017 | By Kaylee-Aurora

“Modern” architecture has never been taken very seriously in this country. And rightly so! It’s gloomy and plain, stomping around the edges of our culture like some black-booted spinster we do our best to avoid at a backyard funeral. All that changed under Barack Hussein Obama, thanks to the hardcore liberal media and their insatiable globalist masters in the Bilderberg...

“Rompers,” The Subversive Gay Fashion Trend That’s Putting the Trump Presidency At Risk

Thu, Jun 15, 2017 | By Stephenson Billings

In today’s red hot political climate, nothing is more of a turn-on than Donald J. Trump’s unbuttoned masculinity. It’s an enormous, rock-hard statement that millions of Americans are desperate to grasp. But now that veiny display of our nation’s raw purpose is under attack by members of the radical leftist elite. They will not stop until every last shred of moral decency...

Media Silent Over Report That James Comey Was Killed in Bowling Green Massacre and Replaced By Crisis Actor Sean Hayes to Distract Trump From Canadian Invasion Plans

Wed, Jun 7, 2017 | By Moishe Mustafa McPhearson

Globalist socialist media outlets including the New York Times, AOL Search and The Chive have completely censored the shocking true story of “James Comey,” despite undeniable confirmation by citizen journalists at 4Chan.org this week. The news utterly destroys the “Putin Hacked the Election” hoax and undermines Comey’s upcoming testimony before Congress. For President...

Are Computer Programmers Descended From Ancient Aliens?

Fri, Jun 2, 2017 | By Henricus Institor

In the last three decades, we have witnessed an unsettling rise in the number of people who self-identify as “computer programmers.” Some argue that these young people have been lured into the lifestyle through reckless Hollywood propaganda. From Weird Science to NCIS, the liberal media has portrayed this subculture as nonstop thrills, full of fast-talking women and hot...

Just Say NO to the Resistance!

Sat, Feb 4, 2017 | By Kellyanne Conway

As a mother, I thought the triumph of Donald J. Trump would be a precious moment for America, a time when we sent our children away to sing patriotic anthems and beat off the ethnic hordes menacing our borders. But so many protests have happened since the inauguration, so many attempts from within to threaten all that Mr. Trump believes in. Today the cult of extreme liberalism...

Wikileaks Reveals Victim of Bowling Green Massacre Was About to Implicate Hillary in Chemtrails Conspiracy

Sat, Feb 4, 2017 | By Stephenson Billings

Murphy Nixon clutched a valise close to his chest and crossed Fountain Square. It was a bright morning in Bowling Green, Kentucky and the famed horticulturalist from upstate New York had an important meeting. Days earlier he had contacted Scott Pruitt, a respected lawyer and now President Trump’s nominee for head of the EPA. They were to meet in the quiet Southern town to...

“Fact Checking” to Be Classified an Act of Treason, According to National Security Advisor Bannon

Thu, Feb 2, 2017 | By Stephenson Billings

In recent weeks, top CIA analysts have noticed a disturbing uptick in terrorist chatter coming from within the borders of the United States. These threats are aimed directly at the White House. The worst of it includes missives launched against President Trump’s honesty and integrity. The bulk of this vile intimidation has been covertly traced back to two extremist groups,...

Blue Apron Is Turning Millennials Into Mindless Slaves of the Robot Dystopia

Wed, Feb 1, 2017 | By Kaylee-Aurora

I just broke free of meal kit mania! After six hellacious months of Alaskan salmon and Meyer lemons, I finally said enough is enough! It all seemed so thrilling at first. The muscled young deliveryman, that bulging package right at my door! The exotic meals, the fancy menu cards! I was delighted and my husband even stopped shouting about his Durango’s radiator coils long...

Trump’s Extreme Fear of Staircases Is NOT a National Security Issue!

Tue, Jan 31, 2017 | By Derby Mack

If you’re like me, nothing gets you more outraged than libtards who hate America! This time they’re doing it with a shocking act of hypocrisy aimed at our beloved President Donald J. Trump and his very personal health issues. Could these bullies get any more nauseating! Let’s set the record straight before the propaganda ministers at CNN turn this into another fake...