Is the Looney Left Using the Fake Mika Brzezinski Story to Distract Us From the Trillions Obama Spent Building Super Cat Colonies on the Moon?

Posted on by Stephenson Billings

Leftist rock group Klaxons paid homage to the first generation of Obama’s castronauts with their 2010 album, “Surfing the Void.”

Government waste is catapulting America into a financial abyss, yet democrats just want to talk Trump’s Twitter.

Top experts were quick to label this week’s Mika Brzezinski hullaballoo a non-story, particularly at a time when the President is making amazing strides in eliminating health care and empowering investment banks.

It really makes you wonder why radical leftist activists are so anxious to change the subject! What in the world are they hiding?

It turns out what they’re hiding isn’t exactly on this world at all! 

On Thursday, a top CIA official revealed that the Bill Clinton Administration funded a series of NASA projects that defy any Biblical sense of morality. Yet this story was almost immediately buried in the corporate mainstream media.

It appears that Ms. Brzezinski is more important to the DNC than those poor, suffering children on the Red Planet!

As an investigative journalist, I’m always on the lookout for ways liberals manipulate the news narrative and something about their eagerness to deflect from the Mars sex slave colony just didn’t sit right with me.

After a little digging on space travel, I discovered some fascinating scientific evidence that cats may not have originated on Earth. They’re also likely involved in the chemtrails conspiracy. Naturally, I knew this meant that there had to be a connection to Hillary Clinton and the Obama White House.

Felines represent the epitome of the leftist Saul Alinsky mindset. They’re infinitely lazy yet consider themselves intellectually superior. Many are drug addicts. They will defecate on your best sweater and enjoy watching you clean it up. They are, in a word, the spirit guides of the Democratic Party.

Super space cats may now be setting their sights on retaking Earth.

“Who better to send to the Moon than cats?”

According to a leaked post on the conspiracy research website Reddit.com, this is precisely how Hillary Clinton broached the subject in a secret meeting with the Council of Foreign Relations in 2010. George Soros approved the plan but with one caveat: These had to be Super Cats, not ordinary tabbys.

Up until recently most believed that Super Cats were a myth. The rumor is that this special breed of felis catus can grow up to ten times the size we normally associate with our domesticated pets. They are uniquely immune to chemtrails and seem to transmit at a higher frequency than even the most woke human beings. They can perform advanced quantum mechanics with ease, but prefer not to. They’ve even been known to use MK Ultra mind control to force their owners to attend to their every need!

Of course, such a master race of felines would be an incredible asset for the Democratic Party.

We simply don’t know how much Barack Hussein Obama spent on this particular NASA black budget item, but it’s clear that claiming the Moon for hardcore liberalism has always been a top priority. Just imagine how many illegal votes they could get from an astral body singularly devoted to socialized medicine and homosexual orgies!

With that $10 trillion investment at stake, it’s obvious why the liberal media needed to manufacture the public’s outrage over Mika Brzezinski provoking the White House this week. Indeed, many suspect that Brzezinski herself may be involved with the Super Cat Colony Conspiracy. We actually have no idea how far up this scandal goes, but it’s well within our rights to speculate that these castronauts have grown so powerful on their Moon bases that they now control Ms. Brzezinski and her entire staff! This is proven by the obvious feline bias of MSNBC’s 2010-2017 pet coverage to say the least!

There are bigger questions, however.

Maybe we should be asking ourselves why Super Cats need their own news network. Are they planning to recolonize the Earth and turn the human race into dutiful slaves, forced to be at their beck and call for food and warmth 24 hours a day? Is this the horror that Donald Trump is truly fighting against? Is the President distracting us from this horrible fate by letting the media blow up the “Russia hacked the election” hoax? Does this all prove his profound love for the working class people of America? Is there any better reason to vote Republican in the upcoming midterms?

It may be too soon to guess, but obviously the answer to all of these questions is a resounding YES!

Some believe that proof of the feline conspiracy is right in front of us, including the infamous “Cats in Space Quoting Scientists” Facebook group that may be transmitting world domination plans from a Moon colony.

About This Journalist

Dr. Stephenson Billings is an award-winning Investigative Journalist, Motivational Children's Party Entertainer and Antique Soda Bottle Collector all in one special, blessed package!

  • Glambike

    What kind of stupid website is this?

    • Unpolarized

      Satire, like The Onion

  • Blanche Beecham

    My Grand-niece is in a, a-hem – “rebel” phase – of her walk in Christianity. She is the leader of a band of musical feminists called “Xanax and Cats”.

    While the space-cat consortium can’t be ignored (I mean, look at those precious little uniforms!), I also wonder about the Cat-Big Pharma connection.